Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
