I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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