You don't have asthma, your pregnant
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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