they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
