Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
