They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
Randomize
