I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
