he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
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