and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I think a kid would responsible me up
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
