can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
