even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
