This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
