Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
