dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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