i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
