Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
This is the high leading the old right now
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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