my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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