I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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