you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Randomize