She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Randomize