is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
When are your genitals available?
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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