its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
