I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
