Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize