I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
