its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
