there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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