K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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