i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
did you just send me my own nude
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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