I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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