I'd wear matching sweaters with you
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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