Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
