is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
