nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
