I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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