arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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