i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
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