One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
