in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
