Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
