hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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