Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
