I don't think brook has ever known best
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
