so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
