So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
