belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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