Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
