i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
