everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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