So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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