I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
